Poe on Prose

     Books that describe compelling characters, untimely turns, and unexpected twists have a better chance of becoming the next best seller than those that merely tell a story. Publishers look for books that "show" rather than "tell" because they know that readers like to become engaged in the action. Whether your genre is romance, mystery, history, or horror, aspire to lead your readers through that fictional wormhole, and expose them to a world that stimulates their emotional insight.
     J.K. Rowling's penned the blockbuster Harry Potter series, and won fan favor because she introduced credible protagonists and dubious scenarios. With the likes of Stubby Boardman, the lead singer of the Hobgoblins, or Mungo Bonham, who founded St Mungo's Hospital for Magical Ailments and Injuries, no wonder her books were such a hit!
     As you develop your story, inspire readers with rich words that allow them to imagine the action as it unfolds.
     Consider erotica. The mental image of two naked people, dipped in chocolate, and rocking it hard as their bodies soak in orgasmic response; turns some folks on so much that they eagerly run to the bedroom and re-create the moment. Ya think?
     Historical fiction writers might share bits of information that depict differences between then and now, e.g., frayed photographs, an old typewriter found in the attic, or an apartment complex that now stands where bare land used to be, are examples of ideas that encourage readers to "see" past moments.
     Classic literature provides excellent illustrations of how to "show" a story. I copied a paragraph from Edgar Allen Poe’s 1844 short story titled The Angel of the Odd. As you read, notice how Poe describes the "avenues to death' in such a way that you are left wondering how it would feel if you would have made the same horrific mistake.
     "The avenues to death are numerous and strange. A London paper mentions the decease of a person from a singular cause. He was playing at 'puff the dart,' which is played with a long needle inserted in some worsted, and blown at a target through a tin tube. He placed the needle at the wrong end of the tube, and drawing his breath strongly to puff the dart forward with force, drew the needle into his throat. It entered the lungs, and in a few days killed him."
    How would you describe a room? Would you mention the leather couch, the fireplace, or the artwork? Observe a decorated room through Poe’s Philosophy of Furniture. 
    "A want of keeping is observable sometimes in the character of the several pieces of furniture, but generally in their colours or modes of adaptation to use. Very often, the eye is offended by their inartistic arrangement. Straight lines are too prevalent - too uninterruptedly continued - or clumsily interrupted at right angles. If curved lines occur, they are repeated into unpleasant uniformity. By undue precision, the appearance of many a fine apartment is utterly spoiled."
      American poet Walt Whitman, who overtly explored sexuality in his poetry collection titled Leaves of Grass, described Poe's writing this way: "Poe’s verses illustrate an intense faculty for technical and abstract beauty, with the rhyming art to excess, an incorrigible propensity toward nocturnal themes, a demoniac undertone behind every page. … There is an indescribable magnetism about the poet's life and reminiscences, as well as the poems."
   James Russell Lowell, political satirist and author of The Biglow Papers, described Poe’s short stories this way:  "In his tales, Mr. Poe has chosen to exhibit his power chiefly in that dim region which stretches from the very utmost limits of the probable into the weird confines of superstition and unreality. He combines in a very remarkable manner two faculties which are seldom found united; a power of influencing the mind of the reader by the impalpable shadows of mystery, and a minuteness of detail which does not leave a pin or a button unnoticed."
     In Life of Poe, Lowell said, "Mr. Poe's early productions show that he could see through the verse to the spirit beneath, and that he already had a feeling that all the life and grace of the one must depend on and be modulated by the will of the other."
     Poe showcased excellent writing like this: "…such a work should be original, and should have an emotional impact on the reader." He explained that when a great writer composes a tale; "he has not fashioned his thoughts to accommodate his incidents; but having conceived, with deliberate care, a certain unique or singular effect to be wrought out, he then invents such incidents; he then combines such events as may best aid him in establishing his preconceived effect."
     Poe believed that great writers begin with the story’s ending.  He said they should establish what emotional effect the end should have on the reader, and bear that in mind with each word. He believed that every event in a story should maintain the desired emotional outcome, and that superfluous details should be eliminated.
     Here are a few more tips to help you "show" your story.

1. Describe your character with elements other than (or in addition to) obvious physical features.  In Bram Stoker's Count Dracula the author described the handsome aristocrat as thin, with a pointed nose, sharp teeth, and hair on his palms. Besides the "hair on his palms," it was the more telling details such as, his education at Scholomance Academy where he studied the black arts; his ability to shapeshift at will; or his inhuman strength that depicted the handsome lady-killer.
2. Research the time and/or region that you are writing about: Whether you go back a hundred years or ten, do your homework, and highlight the differences.  For example, lets say your story takes that 4-hour drive East along I-10 from Houston to New Orleans. Pepper your story with cultural and regional comparisons that create "A-ha!" moments for readers to latch on to. For example, consider the underground caskets in Houston, and aboveground caskets in New Orleans; or the nightlife at Bayou Place compared to a night on Bourbon Street.
3. Write believable dialogue that inspires your reader to pause and think. In The Biglow Papers, author James Russell Lowell, a New Yorker, used ridiculously poor spelling to present a convincing Yankee dialect. In his introduction to The Biglow Papers, Lowell wrote, "few American writers or speakers wield their native language with the directness, precision, and force that are common as the day in the mother country.” 
4. Whet your reader’s appetite with inner thoughts. For example, "Jenny spent hours getting dressed. She looked forward to her date with Danny and wanted to wear something that would excite him. She looked out of the window and saw Danny walking to her front door. Is he kidding me, she thought to herself. I’m dressed in this sassy little number and he looks like crap. Obviously, he could care less about tonight. 
5. Move your reader with adjectives and adverbs (see my blog titled Wake Up Your Mojo).
6. Don’t show too much. Leave room for imagination. Consider this example: "James was startled when the bright, red telephone that was sitting next to the bed, rang loudly and woke him up." Unless "red" signifies some sort of special power, we don’t need to know what color the phone was, where it was placed, or how loud it rang. Focus on James, not the phone.
7. Use descriptive words to pull out the overtone. Perhaps you are writing about a demon-possessed schoolgirl whose surroundings are mostly angelic. Use descriptive words such as "devilish", "evil", "shadowy",  "light", etc., to describe how the girl’s demonic inclinations darken the pink, cheery walls of her bedroom.
8. Spotlight major people, places and with more description than minor people, places, and things. In the 1994 classic tale, 1984, author George Orwell uses a Scarlet Sash, Room 101, and Chess Pieces to depict essential components throughout the story.
9. Describe realistic events realistically. While proofreading an erotic novel, I came to the following passage: "He gently laid her on the bed, spread open her legs, and asked her to straighten them upwards so that he could see her full vagina (Do porn writers use the word "vagina"?). He removed her panties."

     I have two problems with this description. If she were still wearing panties, how would he get a full view of her vagina? Second, if her legs were still pointed straight up in the air, how did he remove her panties? Did he have to stand up on the bed in order to remove them? If not, at what point did she lower her legs?

     Cloudy, unrealistic details promote a cloudy, unrealistic book.

    10. Examine great literature. Zero in on ways that popular writers describe characters and events. As you describe portions of your own story, close your eyes, and see what pops out at you. Detail relevant points. Then ditch all of the rest.

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